


Discordant Flavors

by sunnynights



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Arguing, Family Dynamics, Fights, Gen, M/M, Parent-Child Relationship, Post-Canon, Post-Episode: e067-069 Story and Song Parts 1-3, Siblings, TAZ Balance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-29
Updated: 2020-01-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:40:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22457374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunnynights/pseuds/sunnynights
Summary: It's been a few months after the Day of Story and Song. Taako has found his rhythm in this new life, but sometimes Lup says things that strike a nerve.
Relationships: Angus McDonald & Taako, Kravitz/Taako (The Adventure Zone), Lup & Taako (The Adventure Zone)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 123





	1. Chapter 1

“Why do you have to go to work while we’re on vacation?”

Taako wrapped his arms around Kravitz’s waist and pulled, but Kravitz easily dragged him out of bed.

“Necromancy doesn’t stop because you’re on vacation.”

“But why do _I_ have to get up early?”

“Taako, it’s almost noon.”

Taako sat on the corner of the bed and sulked as his boyfriend gave him a warm smile and adjusted his tie in the mirror. It was rare for them to all be in one place. Taako had been traveling around, making preparations for his upcoming magic school. Angus spent his time teaching in Neverwinter. Kravitz, Lup, and Barry were constantly at work putting a stop to violations of the Raven Queen's order. But every now and then, the stars would align and they would all be free at the same time. This was one of those times, a few weeks of vacation spent in a cozy cottage on the edge of the Felicity Wilds, now interrupted by obligation.

Taako sighed and stood up, inspecting his duck pajama pants (a gift from Magnus) and Fantasy Costco t-shirt. With a wave of his hand, they were transformed into a loose yellow blouse neatly tucked into white linen culottes. He lifted his hand to his face, about to cast his usual glamour over his face, when Kravitz gently but firmly grasped it. Right. Taako was trying to get out of the habit of putting it on at home. Kravitz looked at him encouragingly and lightly kissed his hand, making Taako practically melt into him. The reaper pulled Taako close, grabbing his scythe with the other. He extended and swung, opening a rift in the air that the two of them walked through.

“Good afternoon, sirs!”

Angus McDonald waved through the window as he stood on the porch. Lup and Barry, usually in their human bodies, floated today in their lich forms. They sparked with red arcane energy, prepared for the day’s work. Lup jokingly rolled her eyes at her brother’s arrival.

“Do you guys really need to do that every time? Just take the stairs.”

“Morning, jealous. Hi, Barold. Why is Ango outside?”

“He’s waiting for the mail,” Barry answered. “He’s been out there for an hour now.”

"Well, if you guys are gone all day," Taako said, pulling ingredients out of the fridge and various cabinets. "I can start on dinner and work on the SADMILF."

Barry and Kravitz simultaneously groaned. The 'Super Awesome Dessert Made Including Lup's Favorites', or the SADMILF as Lup and Taako _insisted_ on calling it, was a combination culinary and arcane treat that Taako was devising in secret for their birthday. He had been working on the recipe for months, making a complete mess of the kitchen on the daily and raining fury at anyone that tried to take a peek. It supposedly had six layers, fourteen flavor profiles, fifty ingredients, and one very very bad name.

"It's here, it's here!" Angus ran in, carrying several letters and a box. After tossing the letters on the table, he gingerly began opening the box. From within it, he pulled out a book and held it out like it was made of glass. "A preorder copy of the newest Caleb Cleveland, Kid Cop!"

Taako, stirring something in a large bowl, wrinkled his nose. "Who still reads paper books? Didn't I get you a Fantasy Kindle for Candlenights?"

"Reading on a screen is great and all, but it can't compare to the experience of owning a real book!" he replied, earning himself a high five from Kravitz. He carefully placed the book back in its box and looked through the other mail. "Hey, here's a letter from Merle! He says he's stopping by Neverwinter this August and wants to know if I'll join him, Mavis, and Mookie on a week-long camping trip."

Taako turned to him, spoon in hand. "Here, come taste this. Yeah, that's cool and all, but my magic school is opening in August and we kinda need all hands on deck. Maybe they can stop by for dinner instead, sorry bubbeleh."

Lup ruffled Angus' hair. "C'mon Taako, let him go camping. It sounds like a lot of fun."

"Oh, I don't mind, Miss Lup! I love to help Taako, and I'm very qualified."

"Right, but you don't _have_ to. You should be out playing with other kids."

Taako frowned, crossing his arms. He narrowed his eyes at his sister. "He promised me months ago that he would help me and Ren out at the opening. I'm teaching him to respect his prior commitments."

"You're teaching him how to grow up too fast."

" _We_ grew up too fast. We didn't have money or a home or anyone that gave a fuck about us. So in that regard, Angus is growing up just fine. Or do you have a problem with how I raise him?"

"Hey Angus," Kravitz said calmly, scooping up the boy. "How about we go to your room and find a safe place for your new book?" He shot Taako a warning look as he opened a rift upstairs and took Angus with him.

Taako just huffed and looked away, stirring more furiously. He could feel Lup's eyes on him. Barry made a small sound in the back of his throat, like he was about to say something but decided against it. After minutes of tense silence, Kravitz returned, this time taking the stairs. He glanced at the two liches uncomfortably.

"We had better get going now."

"Oh, _should you,_ Krav?" Taako snapped back, without turning around. "Are you sure you all _trust_ me to take care of Angus by myself?"

Lup lit up like a flare, red energy expelling outward, as she glared."Taako, what the fuck is your problem?"

He spun on his heels to face her, the spoon in his hand now wielded like a weapon. "Just admit it."

"Admit _what?"_

"You think I'm bad at being a parent."

"I never said that."

"Then _what_ Lup?"

"I just don't think you should get to make decisions for him."

Taako's blood boiled. He put down the spoon roughly, nearly flipping the bowl on the counter. Ignoring the mess his hard work made behind him, he took a step closer to Lup. "So you'd prefer if no one kept an eye on him? _Now_ who's making him grow up too fast?“

“You know that’s not what I mean.”

“Hey, did it ever occur to you that maybe I’m trying my fucking best? That up until five months ago, the only people in this world I trusted were Kravitz and Angus? I was starting from scratch, I didn’t get to remember my century-long friendships and have a little fifty-year long love story.”

“Okay Taako,” Barry interrupted in an unusual display of confidence. “I think that’s enough.” He winced at the looks both twins gave him.

“Shut up, Barry. I don’t have to take this.” Lup began to rise several feet in the air until she was looming over Taako. Her features were barely visible as she became a ball of arcane anger. “Don’t pretend like you had it harder than me. You got to be around people, see our friends.”

“I didn’t know who they were! I didn’t know _anything!_ You left us, and Lucretia took whatever else we had.”

“I was in a _fucking umbrella for twelve years!_ “

“Next time, maybe just stay there.” The kitchen was near silence, except for the crackle of lich energy. Taako could almost feel the heat coming off Lup, tendrils lashing out like a slap in the face. He waited for her to say something, say anything. Instead, she grabbed Barry’s hand and flew out of the cottage.

Kravitz watched them leave, then turned to face his boyfriend. There was anger in Taako’s eyes, defiance. But behind that, years and years and _years_ of abandonment. He made a movement towards Taako, who shrugged away.

“Get the fuck out of here,” the elf spat.

And Kravitz did. His neat suit and handsome figure transformed into one of bone and ragged black cloth. A symbol of death, decay, desolation. The reaper rose up and followed his coworkers out the door.


	2. Chapter 2

Taako rested his elbows on the counter, staring daggers into the pot heating on the stove. Beside him was an array of metal cooking utensils, all bent in half. "Fuck this," he muttered, conjuring a pair of boots. "Angus, I'm going for a walk."

The Felicity Wilds was not a welcoming place. The sun was high in the sky but the light failed to penetrate into the dark unknown. It was densely wooded, with pine trees providing cover for all matter of creatures. Though Taako wasn't worried about his ability to fend them off, he usually kept away. But today, something beckoned him to enter.

He walked, his feet eventually finding a dirt path through the woods. The impassioned fury, the need to make Lup hurt, was gone. Replaced by a wave of dull anger that throbbed in his chest, though he wasn't sure what he was angry about anymore. Lup hadn't been completely wrong, but the way she said things bothered him. Like she always knew better than he did. She may have been by his side for centuries, but the twelve years apart taught him things that she didn't know. The nerve of her, to come back into his life and tell him what to do.

Taako skidded to a halt when he saw where he found himself. A clearing in the woods that he recognized alarmingly well. It was the old location of Wonderland, the lich lair he had traversed through with Magnus and Merle. With the illusion magic that embellished it now gone, it just looked like a squat grey building with a heavily boarded-up entrance. Out of the corner of his eye, Taako saw a flash of red. His ears perked up.

"Lup?"

"Close, but no dice. A shame, really. You were always so good at games." From around the side of the building came the hooded skeletal lich form of Lydia. Seeing Taako's hand reach for his wand, she laughed. "There's no need for that, Taako. You've already taken everything else from me." She playfully vogued towards him.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" As he spoke, Taako's words expelled a black smoke. Lydia's eyes fluttered as she absorbed the smoke, letting the negativity held within wash over her.

"I live here. What are _you_ doing here?"

"Last I checked, we watched you die. How are you back?"

"You clearly don't know too much about liches. I'd say ask your sister, but..."

"Don't talk about my sister." Again, another cloud of black smoke. Seeing this, Lydia grinned.

"Why not? She destroyed my brother after you put him in that umbrella of yours. Now she’s destroying you too." She floated closer to him until they were face to face. "You and I are _very_ alike," she cooed. "We both lost everything we cared about and built a new life. Only difference is that I had Edward, and you had to go through with it all alone. So of course Lup doesn't understand what it's like. She's a lich! She _feeds_ off your unhappiness. She wants to see the things you love taken away again."

Taako took a wobbly step back. "You are so full of shit," he said, the smoke billowing as his words wavered.

"Do you remember the first thing you said when you came to Wonderland?" Lydia waved her hand, and the smoke around her whipped around. It parted to reveal her beautiful elf form, dressed in tight-fitting haute couture of gold, green, and violet. "You wanted to join us. Well, its a little late, but consider your job application approved! We could do so much together, we could make Wonderland even better than before." She gave him a smile that was one part enthusiasm and two parts a predator's hunger.

"What would I have to do?"

"First, you would need to become a lich. But that's no problem. I know you want to. I know that for years, you wondered why your sister hid her work from you, why she chose her boyfriend over her other half. Now you can have everything she has and more. You can go back to a life without her, where she can't intervene with the things that matter to you."

"And why would I do that?"

"Because you _hate_ her. You're _jealous_ of what she has, and you're _mad_ at what she does." Every word from Lydia punctured Taako like a knife wound, black smoke shooting out like gushing blood. He fell to the ground, crawling backwards on his hands and knees.

"Sh...shut up. I love my sister."

"But does she love you? More than she loves Barry?"

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"Face it Taako, she replaced you _years_ ago. But now that you have your little family, Lup just can't take it."

Taako grasped his wand and tried to cast a spell at Lydia. A tendril of smoke rose out of the cloud surrounding her and easily plucked it out of his fist, snapping it in half.

"Final offer, Taako. Join me."

"You hurt me and my friends. You took things from us that we can never get back. And now you're threatening the people I care about? Here's my offer: _go fuck yourself_."

Lydia's smile faltered, then grew into one of grotesque glee. "You should _never_ speak to an employer like that. You might just get _blacklisted!_ " She raised her hands, summoning all the dark smoke into a tight whirlwind. With a flick, she pushed it towards Taako.

The feeling of the smoke filling his lungs was indescribable. It was a cross between inhaling liquid tar and having his chest rolled in shards of glass. He tried to scream in agony, to call out for help, but no sound escaped him. His vision was obscured by the void around him. There was only darkness, suffering, and the faint sound Lydia mockingly calling his name.


	3. Chapter 3

"Taako! _Taako!_ Please get up!"

He blinked groggily, scowling at the hands on his face. Kneeling over him was Angus McDonald, completely in tears.

"Ango, why are you..." Taako broke into a fit of coughing. Angus handed him a canteen of water, which he took graciously and drained. "What happened?" He looked around, expecting to see the remains of Wonderland. Instead, he saw his cottage, right on the edge of the Felicity Wilds.

Angus wiped his tears, his voice quivering. "I went for a walk to find a nice place to read my book. When I came back, the house was filled with smoke. I guess you fell asleep with the stove on and it burned really badly. I didn't think I'd be able to save you but I remembered how I dragged a man across a train compartment that one time. Do you remember that, sir? Anyways, I put out the fire but it's still full of smoke in there."

"Oh, yeah. I'll take care of that in a..." He was interrupted by Angus throwing his arms around him tightly.

"I was so worried!" the boy wept. "I don't know what I would do without you. I'm so sorry I made you and Miss Lup fight this morning."

Taako held on to Angus for a long time, tears of his own leaking from his eyes. He didn't think he ever wanted to let go. Finally, he pulled away, wiping the tears from Angus' face and leaving a trail of soot in their place. "Hey, listen to me. That fight had nothing to do with you. And clearly," he waved a hand towards the smoking cottage. "She was right. You can take way better care of yourself than I can. You don't actually need me. Thank Istus you weren't inside."

"Taako, I've been taking care of myself for a long time. I...I didn't really have anyone else looking out for me. I was so happy when I met you and Magnus and Merle. Because even when you were a little mean to me or didn't do things right, it felt just like a family. And now that the world isn't in constant danger, everyone is off doing their own things. It's great because now I have friends all over the world! But I don't really have a place to call home. I can take care of myself, but I don't always want to. I like it when I can stay with you and Kravitz and we're a family."

The tears began to streak down Taako's face even faster, his composure gone. "So I'm like your dad?" he whimpered.

Angus smiled. "Sure! I didn't have any dads, now I have two!"

Taako bit down a sob of joy. He cast a glamour over himself so Angus wouldn't see what a blubbering mess he was. "Alright," he said, quickly standing up. "I taught you Produce Flame, right? Let's learn unproduce flame."

"That's not a real spell."

"Respect your father, little man."

"Okay, this is already very bad."

————————————————————

Kravitz, Lup, and Barry returned to a house far cleaner than how they left it. The liches went to their room to return to their human form, while Kravitz set down a big paper bag on the table.

"Taako?" he called cautiously. "We got takeout."

"I'm in the kitchen!"

Kravitz followed the voice, his hand over his eyes. "Am I allowed to look, or are you still working on Lup's dessert?"

"It's called the SADMILF, and yes, you can look. You wouldn't know a panna cotta from a flan, anyways."

Kravitz looked around, ready to make a snarky reply when he realized that he really couldn't tell what was being made in this kitchen. Instead, he took his boyfriend's hands. 

"Are you okay?"

"I'm more than okay. Did you know Angus thinks of us as his dads?"

Kravitz's eyes widened. "Oh, wow. That's great!" He kissed Taako gently. It was cold, as usual, but Taako didn't mind. "Do you ever think we might be moving too fast?"

"We've been moving too fast since day one, Bones, what else is new?"

"That's fair. Anyways, I meant are you and Lup okay? I've never seen you two fight like that."

Taako heard a rustle beyond the doorway. "Lup, I know you're there."

She awkwardly stepped into the kitchen from where she was hidden. "We, uh, we bought Fantasy Olive Garden."

"I know, Krav told me." Hearing his name, Kravitz paused and gave Taako an encouraging smile before continuing to walk out.

"Oh." Lup tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear. "We were going to use your unlimited pasta pass, but the..."

Taako stopped her mid-word with an embrace. He felt himself beginning to cry again, but this time he didn't hide it. "I'm so sorry." Not a sentiment often heard from Taako. "I was just angry and hurting and I took it out on you."

Lup patted her brother on the back softly. "It's okay. You're scared of losing things that matter to you, it makes sense. It wasn't my place to tell you how to take care of Angus."

"I guess we never really got the chance to talk about you leaving, and I bottled it up."

"I'm sorry, Taako. But I'm here now, and I'll never leave again. And I shouldn't try to make choices for you."

Taako smiled. "I feel like the last time we ever fought was on the robot planet." Cycle eight. A literal lifetime ago. Whether to destroy a world for the sake of the future, or respect someone else's choices.

"We didn't fight, we disagreed. And we came out stronger."

"I love you, Lup. I trust you with my life."

"You know I feel the same."

Taako broke away from Lup and raced to the counter. He pulled a spoon from a bowl and held it out to her. "Taste this. Don't look at it, just eat it."

She put the spoon in her mouth. Immediately, her face lit up. " _Holy shit._ How is it crispy and pillowy at the same time? And is that, is that kiwi and cinnamon?" Her eyes widened as she glanced at the spoon, her mouth agape. She looked to Taako for confirmation.

"Yup, it's the SADMILF. Fourteen of your favorite flavors, none of which make any sense together,"

"But somehow it works." Lup finished the sentence, then her spoonful. She reached for the bowl, but Taako stood in her path.

" _After_ dinner."

She grinned. "What happened to the surprise?"

"Fuck the surprise. What's the point if I can't share it with you? Besides, I'm putting you to work. I still can't figure out the ratio of pistachio to dulce de leche."

They walked out of the kitchen hand in hand, swapping arcane and culinary theories. Barry and Kravitz had set the table and were in the process of doling out mediocre Italian food. Angus looked up from his plate and smiled at the twins, inseparable and in harmony. Everyone settled in, the tension from this morning not completely gone but overcome by love and being worked through, just as a family should.

Kravitz looked down the hall, frowning slightly. “Is it just me or does my violin look a little burnt?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know everyone hates the "and it was ALL a dream" trope but it felt fitting and also get off my dick. Anyways, I had a lot of fun writing Taako as an angryboy trying to work through his problems. Let me know what you think!
> 
> And if you wanna know what happened to Angus' birth family, keep an eye out for my next fic *laughs in self promo*


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